Become an “Old Person in Training”

Thank you, Ashton Applewhite, author of This Chair Rocks!, for the brilliant suggestion that people of all ages should take up the mantle of “Old Person in Training.” What on earth is that?

The crushing paradox
Because of endemic, internalized ageism—and fear of death—we all dread aging. And yet we all aspire to age. Right? Very few of us want to die young. But we wish we could die without having aged. How’s that supposed to work?

Elders are happier than we are
In study after study, the consensus in people over 80 is that younger people worry way too much about getting old. There’s this amazing happiness “U” curve: we’re actually happiest at the beginning and end of our lives. Getting through the stress of the middle years and into the calmer perspective of older age is cause for celebration.

Close the gap between “us” and “them,” between me-now and me-old
Ashton recommends that we actively work to imagine ourselves into the older person in the next row, or across the aisle. Recognize that their inner life is as rich as our own, no matter what recoil their appearance triggers in an ageist mindset. That alone—recognizing the lively inner existence in the elders among us—is a big step toward breaking down ageist assumptions and our own associated dread.

But there’s a more radical step: imagine ourselves older. How do I expect to look in 20 years? (Hint: It will be significantly different from the way I look now.) What will I be thinking about? Where will I live, work, and play? Who will I have lunch or dinner with? What will I be doing for fun? What will I be doing to cement my legacy and improve the world?

There are many benefits to becoming an Old Person in Training

• We disarm ageism.
• We reduce elders’ isolation and our own dread.
• We prepare ourselves to become the older person we want to be.
• We take back the energy we’ve spent in denial and dread, and use it for something constructive, loving, and fun.

​Try this, and let me know how it goes!